The Do's and Dont's of Wedding Invitations

You only get to make one first impression. That sentiment rings true in so many facets of our lives, but it's especially applicable to your wedding. Despite the intention that your wedding is about two people in love, you also designed it to make a statement. Your wedding invitations are amongst the first details revealed to your guests and consequently, it gives guests their first impression of what your wedding will be like. At the same time, your invite serves as a platform for information and the itinerary for guests: the date, the location, the dress code, the menu and other pertinent details.

Typically hiring a designer to create your invitations eliminates the stress and fear of making mistakes. But we are all about the D.I.Y movement here at WeddingDay, so we understand that creating your own invitations can be a little friendlier on the pocket. We suggest having more than one person proof your invitations before you send them out. Sometimes you stare at something so long, you glaze over what could be a misspelling or inaccurate information.

And then there is the matter of etiquette. Many of the traditional wedding etiquette rules have been disregarded and are now considered outdated, but when it comes to invites, people tend to become offended easily.

The do's and dont's of wedding invites

1. Do not include your registry information on your wedding invites. It gives off the impression that you are asking for gifts. Instead, include that information on your wedding website and encourage close friends and family to spread the word.

2. Do not write "no kids" on your invites. Instead, specify that your wedding is an "adults reception" or specifically list the names of the people who are invited. If people do RSVP with their children's names, it is up to you to call and explain that kids are not invited.

3. Do write guests' names in full, using "Mr. and Mrs." for married couples, "Doctor" for a doctor (whomever is the doctor should be listed first), "Ms." for an unmarried woman over the age of 21, and "Miss" for an unmarried woman under the age of 21. For unmarried couples living together, address their names on separate lines.

4. Do spell out words in the address like "Avenue" or "Street" on the envelope. Example: North Minnesota Avenue, not Minnesota Ave. N. and Saint Paul, Minnesota, not St. Paul, MN. Also, spell out dates: "Friday, the ninth of October, two thousand fifteen" not Friday, October 9, 2015.

5. Do include your deceased parent's name on the invitation if you so wish. Just do not make it sound like the invite is coming from your deceased father/mother. For example, do not say "Mr. John Smith and Mrs. Jane Smith request your presence..." Instead, make the invitation sound like it's coming from you, like this: "Together with their families, Jenna Smith, daughter of John Smith and the late Jane Smith..."

6. Do list your parents' names or the names of people helping to pay the wedding bill on the wedding invitation. If you and your significant other are hosting, it's perfectly acceptable to say "Together with their parents, Jenna and Wade Smith request..." or "Jenna and Wade Smith, together with their parents, request..." or you can leave mention of parents out altogether. There are a number of ways this can be worded. Find the wording that best fits your comfort level.

7. Do include a reception card with appropriate information if it's being held in a location separate from the ceremony. If both events are in the same place, a reception card is not necessary. Make mention of the reception on your invite like "Dinner and Dancing to Follow" or "Reception to Follow."

8. Do let guests know if a complete dinner will not be served during the reception. If you are having appetizers, or a dessert-themed reception, or a light meal, your guests need to know that in advance so they can prepare accordingly.

9. Do choose an invitation design that reflects the theme of your wedding. Think of it as the branding element of your wedding. If you are having an outdoor, laid-back wedding, it would be confusing to send out an elegant black and white formal invitation. Remember, the invite gives guests their first impression or idea of what to expect at your wedding. The styles should match.

10. Do send out the invitation at least six to eight weeks in advance of your wedding. Of course, you should give more time if you are planning a destination wedding or inviting out-of-state guests.