The Crystal Stemware Manifesto

(Jonas Peterson's photography is beautiful and while I don't know him in any fashion, I'm sure he's a fantastic fellow. I just happen to disagree with a blog he posted that a lot of folks have been talking about. That's all!)

I happily admit to being a lover of beautiful aesthetics. I like when things are organized and set in rows, I love the art direction of Wes Anderson films and the papers, files and folders on my desk are arranged in grids and rows. Beautiful aesthetics are also what attract me most to weddings.

I've been involved on the print and show side of the wedding industry for a while now, and time and time again what floors me the most are small, private details like stationary, cakes, escort cards, favors and decorations. I would be remiss if I didn't point out that this focus has become more prevalent since (what I call) the "Blogging Era" has begun; it's become very easy to hyper-personalize and hyper-document a wedding, and, let's face it, a cute row of delicately fashioned escort cards makes for an amazing Instagram photo.

Recently, a blog post by Australian wedding photographer Jonas Peterson has begun to make the rounds again called 'The Mason Jar Manifesto' (hereforto referred to as MJM). It's a beautifully written and poignant treatise about how we shouldn't forget that the main focus of a wedding is the fact that the couple are declaring their love to the world. That, I agree with. I'm a romantic at heart, and I believe that truly expressed love is a powerful thing. Then, he closes with this:

"Why are you doing this? What does it mean to you? Do you really need all that…stuff? And if you want stuff, are you adding stuff that actually means something to you? What do you want to remember from your day? The cake, the flowers, the dress from Hoya de la Poopy? 

Or do you want to focus on that moment between you two? The boy? Who fell in love with a girl?"  

Mr. Peterson, here's where I have to respectfully offer a different take. I put forth the hypothesis that the "stuff" and all of those "details" are increasingly nothing but an expression of the "moment between you two". Hear me out.

Since the title of the piece specifically mentions mason jars (which have become what I think is a cute, kitschy--and inexpensive--drink-holding wedding-guest trope), I would like to address the mason jar's counterpart: crystal stemware. Sure, both receptacles carry intoxicating (or not) beverages and are ostensibly made of glass of some sort, they both say something about the couple.

A mason jar, which MJM considers an unnecessary and distracting detail, is a specifically chosen, catered and meaningful inclusion into a couple's big day. Crystal stemware is simply the default, the plain, the safe. If a couple see themselves as people who wouldn't ever use crystal stemware, then the choice to use a mason jar instead is saying so much. It's saying, "hello guests, we appreciate your sharing our big day with us, and we specifically chose every detail--down to the glasses--that we feel reflects us as a couple."

It is entirely possible that there are couples who specifically choose to use traditional glasses as a reflection of themselves, and that's great too! The opinion that I wanted to get across is that specifically detail-curating a wedding to be the truest possible extension of a couple is not only ok, but it's awesome. What it means is that every photo, regardless of whether it's of the couple or of the mason jars, is seeing a picture of them.

And that's what's important.